1. |
Beauty Or Grace
05:10
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this is the year of making do
with what’s right in front of you, within your grasp
and I no longer have the audacity to ask
for things I don’t think I deserve
‘cause I’ve already exhausted my reserve
of miracles and gifts, surely they’ve run out
and I don’t want to press my luck
I’m just looking for some rain after a long drought
and it’s a hard truth to face
the modern world’s not interested much these days
in beauty or grace
cause balance sheets and bottom lines have taken their place
and I’m impressed with everyone
who somehow manages to press on
‘cause I have emptied every sleeve I have, but never found the ace
and now my tricks are almost gone
and it’s a hard truth to face
the modern world’s not interested much these days
in beauty or grace
cause balance sheets and bottom lines have taken their place
and I don’t need a golden calf
I’d just like to afford to keep doing what I love
and I’m long past needing recognition or a sign from above
at least I can finally say
I don’t think much about the past these days
the now’s enough to handle on its own
‘cause it takes all day everyday to keep rolling up that stone
and it’s a hard truth to face
the modern world’s not interested much these days
in beauty or grace
cause balance sheets and bottom lines have taken their place
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2. |
Halfway Through
04:39
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how much time did I waste
missing a person or a place
when I was never really gone
‘cause I was always hanging on
stuck somewhere off in the past
trying to make some feeling last
when I should really let it go
you’d think by now, I’d know
now I’m about halfway through this thing
but still trying to figure out
what to carry, what to leave behind, and what I can do without
I’m about halfway through this thing
and I’m about halfway through this thing
an emotional pack rat
I’ve carried my whole life on my back
in my mary poppins bag
but now I’m waving the white flag
and I’m about halfway through this thing
but still trying to figure out
what to carry, what to leave behind, and what I can do without
I’m about halfway through this thing
and I’m about halfway through this thing
and I was sure that there’d be some kind of fallout
so I was well-prepared, like any good girl scout
ready to battle back all of the doubt
hold my ground here in my hideout
now I’m about halfway through this thing
but still trying to figure out
what to carry, what to leave behind, and what I can do without
I’m about halfway through this thing
and still learning as I go
still learning as I go, still learning as I go
I’m still learning as I go
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3. |
Blind Curves
05:22
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my uncle wanted me to be a doctor
my sister just wanted me to come home
I might have made a good teacher or a pretty decent mother
but I tried not to look back and I struck out on my own
so many paths that I could take
well lately all I see are possible mistakes
staring back at me when I confront the day
sometimes it’s so hard to get out of my own way
blind curves everywhere
no map to follow out of town
the one I have must be broken
it keeps taking me over the same ground
and coming home don’t feel the same
‘cause I’ve grown tired of the travel and the ache
inside my bones is heavy now
and doesn’t fade as fast as it once did
and flying scares me still but I think more these days
of leaving loved ones on the ground in wait
weighted down by the grief that I create
every time I have to go
and there are blind curves everywhere
no map to follow out of town
the one I have must be broken
it keeps taking me over the same ground
and I try to reason with myself
the same as I would with anyone else
numb the pain with too much work and alcohol
pretending i don’t miss anyone at all
and yeah we’re in the same boat
but it’s not much consolation if the boat is going down
we’ve lost the little things that were keeping us afloat
and it sure feels like we’ve run aground
and there are blind curves everywhere
no map to follow out of town
the one I have must be broken
it keeps taking me over the same ground
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4. |
Better
04:45
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I’ve spent nearly all my life worrying about
what other people think of me
and even though it’s better now, I can’t say that I’m free
but it’s better, it’s a whole lot better
I’ve spent a lot of mornings shaking off bad dreams
trying to make peace with the past
and I don’t know if this truce we made is gonna last
but it’s better, it’s a whole lot better
I snatched half a day from the jaws of the rain
put on a coat and went outside
an unexpected walk in the sudden sun
it always makes me feel so alive
I’ve spent a lot of time wasted on decisions
I couldn’t seem to make
and kept a lot of feelings hidden away
with others I couldn’t fake
and even though I cannot say I’m free of that ache
it’s better, it’s a whole lot better
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5. |
Pinball Heart
04:18
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I’d hate to lead with my chin and take a heavy hit
but I don’t wanna save my best punch
and never get a chance to throw it
so sometimes you gotta go for it
‘cause if you’re stuck in the way that it was
then you’ll always be missing the way it is
when you’ve got a pinball heart
I know sometimes it’s hard
but sometimes you gotta go for it
‘cause you can always turn around
don’t confuse courage with pride
it turns out nothing’s permanent
so don’t keep it locked inside
‘cause sometimes you gotta go for it
‘cause if you’re stuck in the way that it was
then you’ll always be missing the way it is
when you’ve got a pinball heart
I know sometimes it’s hard
but sometimes you gotta go for it
‘cause I been holding on too tight
to all the hands I never won
trying to settle up a losing score
I may be down but I’m not done
and I don’t know if I can steer this craft straight
there are mountains lying in wait
this could all be a giant mistake
but sometimes you gotta go for it
‘cause if you’re stuck in the way that it was
then you’ll always be missing the way it is
when you’ve got a pinball heart
I know sometimes it’s hard
but sometimes you gotta go for it
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6. |
Out To Sea
04:06
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what are you doing in my daydreams
I only see your face at night
I guess you think that you’re a big scream
I’ll say you gave me quite a fright
you send me pictures of your babies
well they look just like her
now the blood is rushing in my ears
and the colors start to blur
drifting out to sea, no one’s around
this is a hell of a drug and it’s taking me down
this week I called you at the office knowing you aren’t there
just to catch your voice recording
so I could practice trying not to care
and if I saw you in the daylight would I know what to say
would you stop and smile or would you walk away
drifting out to sea, trying not to drown
this is a hell of a drug and it’s taking me down
further from shore, out on my own
how did I find myself here
how will I find my way home
well it seems I got the message
when I didn’t get the call
now I have to wonder if
this meant anything at all
drifting out to sea, sounding the alarm
this is a hell of a drug that’s got a hold of me
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7. |
How Long
04:42
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a friend called today, said he lost his wife
she was only 52 and still so full of life
and the way his voice cracked across the line
raised the hair on my neck and for a moment it stopped time
and a friend called today, she’s in an awful spot
she’s scared of going through with it, it’s not what she was taught
and the way her voice cracked across the line
usually I’m full of advice, I had no idea what to say this time
well she’s optimistic about the future,
but how long will it take to get there? I’m not sure.
a Herculean task, staying on the right track
moving forward, while always sliding back.
and a friend called today, he’s got a broken heart
they’ll have to go deep inside and tear him apart
and the way his voice cracked across the line
when he told us that the doctors caught it just in time
and he’s optimistic about the future,
but how long will it take to get there? I’m not sure.
a Herculean task, staying on the right track
moving forward, while always sliding back.
and we’re all flying on instruments
no one’s got a crystal ball
the weather’s bad, the sky is dark,
and I can’t see at all
we judge our past on the greatest hits
looking back on it we only see the best bits
but we judge the present on how it’s going now
but we’re in the forest still, we cannot look ahead
to see our way out
and I’m optimistic about the future,
but how long will it take to get there? I’m not sure.
a Herculean task, staying on the right track
moving forward, while always sliding back.
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8. |
Hey Claire
04:31
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can you describe the weight
when this became your fate
you wanted a job that would make a difference
but this can’t be what you had in mind
unkneel and hit rewind
and don’t accept that sentence
‘cause there are plans, and then there’s how it falls apart
we’re all just out here stumbling in the dark
there are plans and then there’s how it all works out
it’s like the whole world just tuned out
can you break the hold it has on our souls
and restore some common sense
‘cause it’s a trick how this blue light
swallows us up whole
and breaks down our defenses
‘cause there are plans, and then there’s how it falls apart
we’re all just out here stumbling in the dark
there are plans and then there’s how it all works out
it’s like the whole world just tuned out
and we tune in like it’s just fiction
close our eyes and flip right past the friction
a harmless addiction we can’t get rid of
and we become what we love
and we’re still glued to the screen
and the things we see are terrible and mean
the little lie they told made us believe that these are only pictures
‘cause there are plans, and then there’s how it falls apart
we’re all just out here stumbling in the dark
there are plans and then there’s how it all works out
it’s like the whole world just tuned out
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9. |
Wasted Days
04:19
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I’m clinging stubbornly to the little momentum I’ve got left
swallowed up by apathy, inertia has me in its debt
redoubling my efforts
still I can’t get my head on straight
I’ve got my resolutions and a brand new checklist
that won’t cooperate
I’m overwhelmed by wasted days
and if you’d been different, well maybe I’d have stayed
but if I’d been different, I wouldn’t have wanted you to change
there was nothing about you that seemed to suggest
there was any reason for me to second guess
and they passed silently, those wasted days
know when to get out, when you’re on top
or as high as you can get
you may not have won the gold
but take your consolation prize and go
and every year I make a plan to be anywhere but here
so determined to drive away that I forget to steer
but there’s no shame in coming home
to rebuild a bridge you burned
as long as you don’t forget the lessons you’ve learned
maybe then, they weren’t wasted days
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10. |
Flood Zone
06:49
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